The Beauty of an Alto: The Harmony of the Introvert Extrovert Relationship


I love listening to music. I get lost in it. In fact I get so lost in it that I have to turn off the music when I am around others just so I can have a conversation with them. I love the way it weaves in and out of my soul. I love the way I can get lost in a song and the way it affects the way I feel (Seriously, have you ever tried watching Lord of the Rings on mute? Way too much traveling shown for it to affect me the way it does. It’s the music). I love the way thoughts and images, memories as well, fly around in my head. Creativity soaring as I hear a strain of music. And I love how each part comes together to create one beautiful masterpiece.

I was listening to some beautiful music in church one day when my thoughts began to flow as I listened to the sopranos sing. It was beautiful. They sang the melody but when the altos began singing along, splitting the music from unison to add harmony, I was completely mesmerized.
I contemplated the beauty of these two parts singing together, seeing a connection between what I was hearing and the introvert/extrovert relationship. Just as the different parts in a song can create beautiful music, these two personality traits can create a truly remarkable masterpiece.
I’ll focus on the soprano first. The sopranos, in most cases, sing the melody. The melody is the part that gets stuck in your head. You’ll find yourself singing it days later. If you’ve listened to Disney’s Moana’s song, “You’re Welcome,” you probably know what I mean.

The melody is the part that stands out. The center stage.

So, since in most, but not all cases, the sopranos sing the melody, I see the soprano part as the extrovert personality. Extroverts are those who embrace interaction with others. They seem at ease with conversation and thrive on being with others and in groups, they are the ones that usually stand out.

I want to point out that listening to a soprano is beautiful. There is a real talent in someone who can sing that part, both natural talent as well as refined. In similarity, the strengths of the extrovert are beautiful as well, both natural and refined too.

Extroverts are often applauded and praised for their ability to be at ease in a crowd, at ease around others. They are comfortable with conversing. There is a beauty in it and also a need. If no one ever interacted or made their thoughts known, where would we be? If we all just sat back and watched there would be a lot more missed opportunities. And a lot less getting done. There would be a lot less connection and progress.

I love my extrovert friends, I love the way they help me to feel more comfortable in a group setting. When I find myself in a new group situation, it is usually the extrovert that reaches out to talk to me and helps me to feel more comfortable being around people I don’t know. They bring me in, until I feel comfortable enough to reach out to others myself.


Introverts when dedicated and passionate enough about something can act like extroverts in order to accomplish what needs to be done. Yet, it is difficult. With the soprano part in music, it can often be outside of my vocal range. It’s difficult for me to sing the high notes, sometimes it’s just a matter of having confidence in my vocal ability at other times I physically cannot hit those high notes, my voice being more suited for the alto part. When in the right setting, such as when I am feeling comfortable or when I feel I need to be an example to another, I can act like an extrovert. But, it is difficult to do so and even harder when I’m not in the right setting.

In this musical comparison, I see introverts as altos. There is a beauty to them that is not as noticeable as their soprano counterparts. It’s an underlying beauty.

As with most relationships it takes time and a continued effort to build a relationship, even more so with a relationship with an introvert. Yet, when the connection is made, it is a deep connection. The underlying beauty is found.


When an alto joins the soprano part it adds a depth that was not there before. This isn’t to say that extroverts are shallow. I’ve known extroverts who are quite profound with their thinking and also really care about others. But, introverts take more time to think and ponder. They have a rich inner thought process and the ability to really think things through. If they are able to organize their thoughts in a way that makes sense to others they benefit others in a unique way. When an introvert speaks, having been given sufficient time to think, there is a lot of meaning behind it. But, sometimes it can be hard to really know for an introvert to really know that what they are saying makes sense to someone else because they have made connections in their mind that they have not expressed in the discussion.

The introvert’s deep introspection also keeps them from acting right away. In many ways this can be good as they cautiously look at different situations to see if they are worth pursuing.

The funny thing about me having the vocal range of an alto is that it is easier for me to pick up the melody, while an alto usually sings the harmony part. Likewise, it can be harder to notice an introvert than an extrovert. It is also harder to get know them, to hear them. We are not the type of people to open up to others easily, to share all of our thoughts. It takes time and a continued effort on both sides.

Introverts and extroverts are different. This is a beautiful blessing. If we were all the same, we would not have progressed to where we are at in this world today. We would not have all the technology that we do or all the different perspectives that uplift and inspire others. If Ghandi or Mother Theresa were the same as all the others, would they have had such an impact on so many others’ lives? The differences are beautiful. The soprano part and the alto part are both beautiful in their own way, and the same is true for extroverts and introverts. We need to understand that beauty as a society and embrace each other for who we are.

As I listen to music, and the song is played or sang in unison, it is beautiful. But, when it splits into harmonies, it can take my breath away as all the parts of the music move apart from each other but in a way that still works, that still creates a striking masterpiece.

Together introverts and extroverts can work together simultaneously on similar ideas and systems, but when they use their individual strengths, their differences, together in a harmonic way, they combine to create a something different altogether that would not have been possible without each other. Each are beautiful on their own, and at times alone is needed, but together is something truly remarkable. Let’s strive to create a masterpiece together.

14 comments

  1. This is such an amazing way to look at it. I'm definitely more of an introvert and I get what you're saying about being able to mimic an extrovert. This analogy works so well!!

    Sophia x http://sophiawhitham.co.uk

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  2. I absolutely love this post! The analogy is so simple and very effective :) Comming from a music lobing family it also makes absolute sense! My sister and I are like this, I am more of an extrovert and she is definately more of an introvert, but together we get along great and complement each other very well! I will send her the link to this blog post too, I think she would really like this read as well! Thank you!

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    1. Thank you so much Ella! Love that you have such a great relationship with your sister and how complementary it is.

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  3. what an amazing post!! Im a definite introvert but I do have some traits of extrovert from time to time :)))

    www.susanalopessnarey.com

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  4. It's like me and my husband. He's the extrovert and I am the leave-me-alone-with-my-craft kind of gal, lol!

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    1. I love that it fits your relationship with your husband. Thanks for sharing!

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  5. That's an amazing post, I'm an introvert and thankfully my partner is too. :) love this perspective x

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  6. Beautifully written piece about extroverts and introverts! Thank you for sharing your perspective with us. I am an introvert and an alto, so I especially can relate to your example!

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